I spent most of my life looking in the mirror without cringing. So what changed? My body has certainly changed but that’s nothing new. My weight and shape have been up and down. I’ve had surgeries and I carry scars. My body has changed.
Learning to love my body
I’m learning to love my body at 39. I used to love my body, imperfections and all, but now loving my body is something I have to work at. I hesitate to accept my physical body as it is.
The last year has been wrought with nagging health challenges, hormonal fluctuations, faint wrinkles around my eyes from years of laughter, and changes in my weight distribution. I haven’t accepted my physical self and the challenges and changes in my body. I’ve lamented and struggled and hated- yes, hated- my body for it’s limitations.
Maybe when I look in the mirror I see how my body has changed and I still resent the headaches, weight gain, and gasping for breath in the midst of an asthma attack. I still resent the lack of a good night’s sleep and resulting exhaustion. Is accepting my health is the key to accepting my body image? What does it take to love my body? What does it take to see myself as beautiful?
When I look at this woman, I only see beauty. I don’t see limitations, I don’t see insecurities and frustrations. I don’t see social concepts or personal ideals. I see me.
Photo by Stacey Palm Photography